Bad bad news

I was admitted to hospital last Monday. Reason for it is to get blood transfusion and since I am at hospital, my doctor 'soon pian' requested me to do CT Scan and MRI Scan as it is time to check the result. Well, I was very sad on the result......

I still remember that night at hospital, before I get any of my scan done, just so happened that I felt there are 2 round things on my neck......feel like is tumour, immediately I have that taught!! Oh no!! Yip yip, bad news is waiting for me. My brain and stomach are stable. Thanks the Lord. Praise the Lord. However, the battle now back to my lung. The original tumour larger in size, from 2cm it grow to 4cm, double in size, no wonder I start to cough recently and heard some sound when I breath. Also there are new tumours at lung, on top of my liver and my neck. It is going to be very challenging....and hard hard time :(

I am going to do RT on lung again, hmmm again I need to suffer the difficulty to swallow food. My Doctor said chemo is not an option for me, sob sob, this is because my recovery period very long, so not much help if do chemo one cycle and the second cycle is done one month later, sob sob, why I so weak??? I want to eat more, I hope I can be stronger to fight.

I keep praying to the Lord to give me mercy and heal me. I want to live.

ps: Sometimes I do have this question in my mind while seeing others people running their normal life as a normal person, why I need to suffer so much ??? But then on second taught, there are a lot more others suffer much much more then me!! I think myself consider lucky, also thanks to cancer that I get to know the Lord Jesus. My healer and loving God.